Embrace You (Part Two): I Asked 50 Artists from Around the World to Draw Me

Hello, friend!  Welcome to my blog.

I know many of you saw the first Embrace You blog post, but just in case you need a refresher, or you're new here - let's take a moment to recap. :-)

Recap

In April, I was walking down the streets of New York City for the very first time, and I noticed several artists drawing tourists in the middle of the pathways in the city.  Watching them work on their newly commissioned art pieces, I couldn't help but wonder, "If I asked them to draw me, would they include my facial, port wine stain birthmark?  Would they ask if I want it included in the image?  Or would they make that decision without asking me?"

While I didn't act on that idea in that moment, a few weeks later I found myself contacting several artists with one goal in mind: To see how many people would naturally include my birthmark in an art piece, and to see how each artist interprets it.

As I started this journey, there were only two rules that I gave each artist:

1. Each piece must remain politically neutral.

2. My character must remain modest in her attire.

Why Call this Project, "Embrace You"?

Sometimes when we look in the mirror, we don't like what we see.  We're having a bad hair day, a new pimple randomly appeared on our face over night, we've been bullied, or we've just never been friends with our reflections.

While this blog entry rooted from an idea attached to my birthmark, I've had days where I've struggled to embrace my appearance because of "normal" reasons.  My hair never wants to cooperate, I've always struggled with my weight, and while my birthmark as a whole doesn't bother me - my face isn't symmetrical because of the extra blood flow...And that's all my personal, internal dialogue going on there.  I've also been turned into a meme because of my difference (which went viral to over 30 million people), been told I'm "contagious", and was once approached about being on the shows "Too Ugly for Love"/"The Undateables".

Trust me, I get it.  It's hard.  It can be a constant, uphill battle - both internally and externally.

Yet, in the last four months, I've worked with 50 artists, and no two artists have drawn me the exact same way.    We so often focus on the small details, rather than who we are as a whole.  So, while I'm focusing on my bad hair on a Tuesday morning, and no matter how we see ourselves in the mirror, odds are...That's not how the rest of the world sees us.  They see so much more.

After sharing the first Embrace You post, I realized that I forgot to share about the logos that were designed.  I have a total of four logos, all of which were created by a super talented artist in Italy.  I absolutely loved working with her, and thought she did great as she created a watercolored edition of my birthmark for this piece.  After emailing her some photos, she wrote back and told me, "...it almost looks like a beautiful watercolour in its self!  It's beautiful!"  Interestingly enough, since then, several of the artists have told me the same thing about the watercolor look that my birthmark holds.

Would they include my birthmark, or not?

You may remember that for some of the artists, I didn't specific for them to include my birthmark.  In fact, I sent them a variety of photos - two where the birthmark is totally obvious, one where it's mild due to makeup, and two where it's totally hidden.  Every time I began to work with a new artist, I let them know, "I can't wait to see what you come up with - and please let me know if you have any questions."  In the end, very few asked.  Most assumed or made that decision without conversation.  Here are some of those images...

This is one of the pieces I received where the artist didn't ask about my birthmark, but he did made that side of my face slightly redder.  When I asked about it, the artist (from the United States) told me, "As for the side of your face I made redder in tone I really had no special reason for doing it other than the reference photo that you sent (the one that I worked from) had a bit redder tone on that side. Sometimes different lighting situations can effect the colors on photos I guess. I just read it as being a little more redder in tone based on the photo I used for reference."  

How adorable is this??  Originally my birthmark was left off the image, but this artist from Indonesia was quick to add it when I made the request. :-)

Just like the art piece above, this artist from India originally left my birthmark off as well, but quickly added my port wine stain to the character he created.  And hey - now I know what I would look like as an anime cowgirl.

YeeHaw, y'all, YeeHaw.

If you saw the original Embrace You blog post, you may recall an image that was created by Sarah Erb, where she drew me with Natalie Grant and Charolette Gambill.  When we first connected online, I just asked her to draw me without mentioning my birthmark.  Quickly she wrote back and asked me if I wanted my birthmark included, and I told her I did.  I loved this piece so much, that's when I asked her to create the piece with Natalie and Charolette.  

Celebration

Here are some of the pieces I received when I asked artists to intentionally celebrate my birthmark and/or a part of my story...

While I shared a photograph on the first blog entry that my dear friend, Rick Guidotti, took - this is another favorite picture that he took.  (And I have to say, this photo really makes me miss my purple highlights.)  Rick is an award-winning, former fashion photographer.  He once spent his days photographing famous models, such as Cindy Crawford, but now he travels the world photographing people with different medical conditions.  He runs an organization called Positive Exposure - and I highly recommend you check out his website to learn more about all the incredible things he's doing.

Oh. My. Word.
Nothing makes me feel as fierce as this piece, which was created by Naia Jozame, from Colombia.  When I asked what inspired the piece of art she created for me, she told me, "All women have a particular beauty, the beauty that you project is unique and very beautiful."  

I love how this artist from the United States  showed me doing one of my favorite things, speaking and encouraging others.  (In this piece, I'm wearing one of my favorite necklaces from Natalie Grant's line.  The necklace says, "Worth More Than Diamonds" - which is always a beautiful reminder of my worth.  I'm also wearing a bracelet from one of my favorite organizations fighting against human trafficking, 3Strands Global.)

Guyyyssssss...If this isn't me, I don't know what is.  Traveling is one of my all-time favorite things to do, and I'm always on the lookout for the next trip. (Speaking of, I think my passport needs to be dusted off sometime soon!)  I think Lenore, from the United States, did a great job capturing me in my element.

I almost feel like I'm in a modern-day person in a fairytale land in this image.  It almost gives me an Enchanted movie vibe, but reversed.  (This was created by an artist in Turkey.)

There are some pieces that I've received that have left me speechless, and this is one of them.  Although I never heard back from her to know what encouraged the artist, Karina (from Chicago), to portray my birthmark as a bird, she did encourage me, "I admire you so much for being so positive with life with your birthmark; never let other people to put you down. Always remember you're beautiful in every way."

If a Peanuts character had a birthmark...And oh my word, I LOVE it.
(An artist in the United States created this piece.)

This image and the one below it are probably the two closest to being alike.  The artist, Angelica (from Denmark), explained, "What inspired me was how your birthmark seemed to be filled with different 'emotions'. The purple/blue/pink color in it is really pretty and it's like it has a story. The butterflies symbolizes grace, vulnerability and beauty, and I just felt like they fitted with what I felt from looking at you. You have really beautiful eyes! So the 'stronger' blue emphasizes that."  Wowzers.  Such depth to her interpretation.

Caitlin Harris, from Canada, created this piece.  I like that she included my birthmark on my lip, as my lip is affected in coloring and size by the port wine stain.

Because of the spotty affect this one holds, it slightly reminds me of what the birthmark looks like a few days after treatment (although after a treatment, my birthmark is typically much darker in tone).
This was created by Arti, from India.

Who doesn't want to be a minion?  This was created by Ashleigh, from Malaysia. 

This piece was created by an artist in India. It's a great piece, and I found it interesting that my birthmark was created more as an orange than pink/purple. 

Y'all.  I'm Princess Leia...And look at the tiny Yoda teaching me the ways of the Force.
Working with  Enrique Fierro from Chili, I remember him asking me what color lightsaber I wanted, so I gave him a typical Crystal reply, "What if the color of it matched my birthmark?"...And voila!  Pink lightsaber I hold, I do.

An artist in Pakistan created this piece of art.

Mirjana from Macedonia created this painting using acrylic.

This piece was created by Eryz, from Indonesia, who often creates comic-style art.  While I gave her complete freedom to create my image how she wanted, I did request the speech bubble to say, "Making a difference with my difference".

Van Gia Hao, from Vietnam, created this image.  Asking him about his art piece, he told me, "My inspiration came from the photo your friend, who is also a photographer, took for you. I wanted to create an image of a strong, confident, and beautiful young woman, whose smile can bring comfort and inspires others around her."  I also asked about his experiences from drawing other people, "I haven't drawn a lot of people who are very confident in themselves, most would ask me to change part of them they don't like, I think they are just being too conscious of their image that they forgot to relax and enjoy life."

Asking Hao if he had anything he wanted to share with you, the reader, he wrote, "To the readers: Be happy with yourself, be nice to other people, never stop learning new things."

My friend Cindy Ellison, here in the United States, created this one.
(Her dad, Brian, is the friend who actually created a 3 minute video about my story.)

This image was created by an artist in India.  

"Scooby Dooby Doo, Where are you"
(This was created by an artist in Pakistan.)

Pink Zero, from Pakistan, drew me as a rockstar. Curious as to why she chose a rockstar (because the irony is not lost on me with my lack of musical talent), she told me, "What inspired me to draw you the way I did was your confidence and the wholeheartedness with which you have accepted every aspect of your personality. To me you seemed like a celebrity in yourself and to be honest I felt there is a cool and fun side of yourself so I depicted that in your portrait!!"  

If you look closely at the butterfly sitting on my finger, you'll notice that the wings aren't the same color.  The creativity of this concept was amazing.  I asked Mikucchi from Indonesia what made her come up with this concept, and she told me, "I don't know about the butterfly. I just thought a quote, 'just because you're different, doesn't mean you're not beautiful!' really suits well with the butterflies!"  Interestingly enough, one of my aunts recently got a tattoo with butterflies - one with two different colored wings, a symbol of me as her niece and of my journey.

Yes, that's me.  As a cat...with a birthmark.  I mean, how fun is this one?  Interestingly enough, I had a bruise near my collar bone in one of the pictures I sent this artist (from Ukraine), and I almost asked them to remove the bruise affect from the cat.  However, because my birthmark is considered a vascular malformation, my iron levels and platelets are affected, and excessive bruising is a common symptom I experience.  Since my birthmark and blood levels are connected, I decided to leave the image as is.

This piece was created by Diana Nemesu, an artist in Romania.  When asked what inspired the piece she created, she wrote to me, "Well I love animals and I figured you loved them too. You are a beautiful person, not only on the outside but on the inside too and I figured I'd draw you as an animal saver, a person who walks on a cold day just to save an abandoned baby animal."  And she's right - I do love animals.  (My dream as an 8-year-old was to open an animal shelter.  I created a business plan for it and everything...Or at least, a business plan by an 8-year-old's standards.)

Okay...Soooo...This is what an avatar would look like with a birthmark.  Wowzers, right?
For those wondering, the gal standing next to me is singer Jamie Grace.  She was in one of the images I sent the artists, as an example to the different colors and shades my birthmark may have.  Out of all the artists, they were the only one who included her in their art.
(This was created by Anindya Kharisma in Indonesia.)

This image was created by an artist in the Netherlands.

An artist in Singapore sent this one to me.  And like the cat image above, he also included the bruise, which I also considered asking him to remove - but didn't.

My friend Denise and I coordinate a women's event together every year, and this graphic was created for this year's event that took place in September.  (Our theme was "Connect 4".)  But this is SO us...I mean, really...Is it any surprise that we're really undercover superheroes - with a Jamba Juice and diet Dr. Pepper in hand? (While I do my best to credit all the artists, this artist's website was down when I went to access it for this entry.  I will be checking again soon, so I can update that information when possible.)

Do you guys remember the TED talk art piece from the first blog entry?  That same artist, Minette Wasserman from South Africa, took the time to draw me as a bunny.  She went above and beyond with the first piece of art, and this one was such a sweet surprise.

My sweet friend, Rachel Donahue (from the United States), sent me this image and the one below it as well.  

This is one of the first drawings I received.  My friend, Rachel Donahue (mentioned above), drew this for me...and I think it's amazing.  She's right - I am so much more than a (port wine) "stain" birthmark, and I am so thankful for the friends in my life who remind me of that on both the good, and the bad days.  (Speaking of...one of my friends, Denise Nicholes, also once wrote a song about my journey with my birthmark called, "Beyond the Stain".)

Making a post on Fiverr, I asked if there were any artists who would be willing to create a Barbie with a birthmark.  This artist from Venezuela replied, and created this design based off the newer Barbies.

The artist who created the Barbie also created this piece, which was super sweet of her to do.  (She also sent me another copy of this character, but with glasses on as well.)

This one is hard to not love, right??  (The artist who created this piece is from Indonesia.)

So. Much. Cuteness.
(This was created by an artist in Malaysia.)

Last but not least, my good friend, David Jones (from the USA), sent me a card a few weeks ago, and this was in it.  You have to save the best for last, right? ;-)

Embrace You Challenge

So many of us struggle to embrace who we are, as we are...And that goes for both our external appearances, to our internal talents and passions.

Growing up, I saw the beauty in specific talents, talents of which I do not hold.  Nearly everyone on my mom's side of the family is musically inclined, yet I can't even keep beat.  As I grew up with one of my cousins, just 6 months apart, he was always mastering a new instrument.  The saxophone, piano, guitar, jaw harp, flute - you name it, he could play it...Yet, I couldn't even manage a tambourine, let alone any larger instrument.

I was always naturally drawn to writing, photography, and other interests.  Yet, until recent years, I didn't see the value in my natural, God-given gifts.  Instead, for years, I guilted myself for not fitting the mold that so many in my family fit into.

...But when I finally started to fully embrace my talents and passions? That's when I was finally able to dare to dream God-sized dreams, and dare to change the world.  My interests in photography and writing?  They're just as important as the talented musicians around me...And I am so thankful for friends in my life who helped encourage and helped me excel in those talents.  I'm thankful for the friends who believed in me before I ever fully believed in myself.

Today I'd like to encourage you to take time to encourage someone around you.

Did someone rock their part in a school play?  Send them a Tweet, and tell them so!  Is there someone in your life that makes you laugh, and you're thankful for the constant joy they bring to your life?  Send them a text message, or a snap on Snapchat.  Do you know someone who struggles with their confidence, and self-esteem?  Send them an old-school, snail mail card, letting them know how beautiful they are - on the inside and out.  And if you have people who are constantly believing in you and encouraging you, send them a note and thank them for the impact they've had in your life.

Encourage someone to embrace who they are, as they are.  And if you see a talent in someone that they don't see within themselves, let them know!  Everyone could use a bit of encouragement in their day.

Be that person who believes in someone, even when they don't quite yet believe in themselves.

The Travelin' Chick,

Crystal

Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.  You can also find me on Snapchat: crystal.hodges

To the Man Who Turned Me Into a Meme

Collapsing on my bed after a long day of classes, I kicked my shoes off and opened my computer. Once my screen lit up, I signed onto Facebook for a short, mental break. I had my usual 15 notifications, but one from a friend really caught my eye: “I saw your picture in my newsfeed today.” 

My picture was in her newsfeed? Confused, I clicked on the attached link… and there I was… along with a stranger’s logo and three simple words: “one like = beautiful.”

I was going viral… to over 30 million people around the world. One share alone has over 256,000 “likes.”

You and I are total strangers who live thousands of miles away from one another, yet our lives have deeply intertwined. Like millions around the world, you don’t know my name, but if you saw my face, if you saw that meme, you would recognize me because two years ago, you created that meme.

Like most people, I occasionally post a selfie online. However, my face doesn’t look like most people’s. I was born with a port wine stain birthmark that covers a good part of my face. And the selfie that was going viral? It was taken just 20 minutes after a laser treatment, which is used to prevent future medical complications, as my birthmark is at risk of growing. (And I blog and speak about my condition, unique experiences and perspective.)

Growing up with a physical difference, I’m accustomed to people staring and making awkward comments as I walk by. It wasn’t until I was 18 that I realized these experiences, which are my normal, aren’t most people’s normal. In fact, most days I forgot about my birthmark. For example: When I was 16 I dressed up as a biker for Halloween and went to a trunk-or-treat with my friends. Several people freaked out, asking me if I fell off my motorcycle, afraid I was hurt. I was confused for an hour… and then it hit me, and I just laughed.

Most people don’t get gawked at in public, and they aren’t told they’re “contagious” or that they are “brave” for leaving their house. But I do. And it happens often. Yet, even then, I still didn’t realize how different I must look… but then you turned me into a meme.

Knowing I hear comments on a regular basis, I stared at my non-blinking, meme-ified selfie and thought, “Why not read a few comments? What’s the difference from reading them than hearing them?”

So I spent a few hours and read a few comments.

Or… 30,000 of them.

As of 730 days ago, a day hasn’t gone by where I have forgotten about my unique appearance.

They say pictures are worth a thousand words. When I went viral, my name, story and my words were missing. Instead, complete strangers were making up their own 1,000 fictional words to go with it.

One man accused me of drowning kittens, and many assumed I asked you to post the image, thinking I didn’t have any confidence in myself. Several pleaded to get me connected with a good plastic surgeon so they could “fix that,” some flat out called me ugly and some wrote, “She’s beautiful, but would be even more beautiful if that weren’t so prominently placed.” A few thought it was just face paint on my cheek, and even fewer knew it for what it was: a birthmark.

While it was my own choice to read the comments, it turns out, there is a difference between reading 30,000 comments within a few hours versus hearing one comment a day. In the midst of this fiasco, one thing stood out to me: both my condition and story were completely misunderstood.  

I was angry with you for the longest time. For nearly 730 days, I resented you. But you don’t deserve a 731st day with me. This experience has fueled my desire to be a speaker and writer, but that’s where you’re influence in my life stops.

For the last two years, I’ve been taking back my selfie. I’ve been taking back my story. I know I am more than some meme that mimics one stranger’s simple perception of my image. I am so much more than thousands of fictional words your followers left next to it on some social media site.

My name is Crystal. I’m the person in this meme. However, in this edition of it, I’ve made some changes. It’s the same meme that went viral two years ago but with a twist. While there is more to my story and more to who I am, thanks to the help of my friends, this image has been created with 10 words that describe who I am.

I’m a writer and a speaker. I’m a friend and a God-sized dreamer. I am creative, confidant, a writer full of wit, and I am talented. I am loved by many — and just like you, I am human. Best of all? I know I’m wonderfully and beautifully made.

It’s time for people to hear my real story, to read the true message of my story and my image. I’m taking back my selfie, owning that meme… taking it back one word, one blog entry and one article at a time.

I’m proud of who I am, as I am. I like the way I look — and I’ve never needed thousands of strangers or the internet to validate my beauty or confidence. After all, we all have differences — I just wear one of mine on the outside. And it’s my goal to make a difference with my difference.

The images surrounding mine on your page were other memes you created: kids with cancer, premature babies and people with missing limbs. You’ve been using images of people (without their consent) to pull at the heartstrings of people, to pull them towards your page. Simply put, that’s not cool. You alone have almost 28 million Facebook followers. Your audience is large. Your influence is strong. Please use it with kindness and wisdom.

Before you take someone else’s photo to make your next meme, remember that image is much more than pixels on a screen. They are writers, singers, travelers, friends, sons and daughters. They are dreamers who reach for the stars and dare to change the world. They too are a human — and they are loved.

Sincerely,
Crystal

Why I Dyed My Hair Purple

Okay...So I didn't dye ALL of my hair purple - but I'm getting ahead of myself.

I started having laser treatments on my port wine stain birthmark as a newborn.  Growing up, we had a tradition to stop for lunch at a two-story Chuck E Cheese after each procedure.  Our stop for pizza was then always proceeded by a stop at an outlet mall, where my mother would spend up to $10 on a new toy or book.  As an adult, our Chuck E Cheese tradition has changed to a stop at a Jamba Juice, followed by a second stop at a fruit stand, Casa de Fruta.

Just a month or so ago, I had my 50th treatment.

Yep.  You read that right: My 50th.

Each treatment sends about 300 laser pulses through my skin, bursting and cauterizing the blood vessels in my face.  Multiply that by 300, and that's about 15,000 laser pulses total.  (Without the treatments, my birthmark is at risk for growth and can develop medical complications.  Even with the treatments, my birthmark has experienced some slight growth.)

About a week or so before my treatments, I always get anxious and stressed.  The smells, sounds, and pain are imbedded in my mind, and I do not look forward to the appointment.

When I realized I was coming up on my 50th treatment, however, I knew I had to do something fun.  People always throw a big birthday bash when someone turns 50, so why not do something similar for my 50th treatment?  After all, if something isn't naturally fun, that just means you gotta find a way to make it fun - right??

Here are 7 ways I made my 50th fun:

1. I made ninja sugar cookies with birthmarks.  Okay, strike that.  I made wanna-be ninja cookies with birthmarks.  Instead, they look like people in weird onesie pajamas doing awkward dance moves. Clearly, I am not destined to be a professional cookie designer.

My first batch looked like sumo wrestlers.  So BAM.
Here's a sumo wrestler with a birthmark. #Flexibility

See.  People in onesie pajamas doing awkward dance movies.
You're welcome.

Okay.  So maybe THIS is why my cookies aren't top-notch.
Oops.

2. I got my nails done.  Making an appointment with my aunt's talented friend, I had my nails painted with the logo of The Vascular Birthmarks Foundation (VBF).  Not only are they the leading nonprofit for vascular birthmarks, but I am their social media coordinator and anti-bullying campaign manager - so it seemed fitting.

Thank you, Paula!

3. Girls have to color coordinate, right?  So that's what I did.  I went to my hair guy and got a few purple highlights put in, color coordinating my hair to my face.  I mean...After all, if my face is permanently purple - what are a few temporary purple highlights? ;-)

My friend, BreAnna, sent me this on Snapchat (crystal.hodges).
It was too adorable not to share.

My hair guy, Sean, is the best.

4. We went to Jamba Juice and Casa De Fruta...Keeping the tradition alive.  Casa De Fruta has the best rocky road (candy) that's impossible to say "no" to, and it's a great place to stock back up on for ice for my icepack.  The drive from Fremont to Casa De Fruta is also a beautiful one.  Nothing compares to the view.  (I should point out that the drive to each treatment is 3 hours each way.)

That. View.

5. My baby niece went with me.  Once my treatment was complete, I received instant baby snuggles.  Now that, my friend, is the way to have a treatment.

She is the cutest, I know.  (Oh, and my birthmark didn't turn super purple like
it normally does.  That's a whole other blog entry, though.)

6. We bought party hats and glasses, and I took selfies with my doctor.  (Yeah, he's pretty great.)  A sash was also on my list, but I didn't want to get too crazy. ;-)

Parrrrrttttyyyyy.

7. I wore my Natalie Grant necklace, "Faith Over Fear".  Every treatment I wear one of her pieces.  I love Natalie's theme, "wear it. live it."  I wear a different one every treatment, varying on my mood and struggles.   During this treatment, I also wore her "Dare to Be" bracelet, reminding me to dare to be confident, beautiful, known, and loved - during and after the treatment.  (Side note - did you all see my blog entry about my God-sized dream coming true, when I shared the stage with Natalie in January?  Check it out here.)

*Insert heart emoticon here.*

Turning my 50th laser treatment into a party didn't take the physical pain away.  However, it did give me something fun to focus on, decreasing my pre-anxiety and stress, all while creating a way for me to celebrate my strength and milestone.  (I'm not sure we celebrate our moments of strength enough.)  It made the days leading up to treatment more enjoyable, and what was once a medical procedure got turned into a party.  All it took was a different, refreshed perspective.

Is there anything you're struggling with?  Are there any situations in your life that need a bit more fun added to them?  Embrace your creativity.  You never know what you'll come up with. :-)

The Travelin' Chick,

Crystal

PS: In my defense, while I can't decorate cookies very well, I DID make some cute Princess Leia truffles.  (This was only my first attempt.  The decoration ideas are original and my own.)