Wednesday, March 6, 2019

Why My Husband and I Had a 'Pop Up Wedding'

Whew. What a whirlwind.

In the last several months, I've unintentionally disappeared from my blog, but if you follow me on Instagram or Facebook – you know my life has had many changes. I had a pop up wedding, the originally planned wedding, moved across the country, and bought a house!

Yeah, I know. That's a lot.

I know I have a lot to catch you up on, but let's start with the pop up wedding. You may be asking, "What is a pop up wedding?" Or, "Why did you guys get married twice?"

Great questions. Let me fill you in.

On June 1, 2018, Richard and I got engaged. Looking at venues, we set a time and place: February 15, 2019, at the Branch and Vine in Madera, California.

Then, our plans were thrown for a loop.

Shortly after we got engaged, Richard then got a job interview in Franklin, Tennessee. Richard started the process of talking with the company and interviewing with them. Before we knew it, several weeks later – he had a job offer.

A senior electrical engineer at 27? Wowzers. He and I were in agreement. He needed to accept the position.

While I was excited, and I was even the one who encouraged him to look in the Nashville area...Richard was now moving to Tennessee. I live in California. And our wedding was still three to four months away.

Then it dawned on me...

I didn't want him to go without me.

After Richard got the job, I was driving to the coastline where he was waiting for me. Mom was there, and my friend from Nashville would be joining us too.

As I was driving, I kept having flashbacks to the last several weeks. During our whole engagement process, because of different stressors, I kept making jokes about us just eloping. Mom would give me the, "Don't you dare," stare. Richard would laugh. And while I was partially kidding, I was also partially serious.

While I drove the three hours, the idea hit me.

What if we did elope – but in an inclusive way? What if we had a POP UP WEDDING?

Then the plan started to unfold.

What if we had a wedding during a church service – but no one knew it was a wedding, except those who had to know? What if grandpa gets up to give a sermon – but instead, "Surprise! Here comes the bride!"
A bride looking into a mirror.

Richard didn't have long before he had to go to Tennessee. He had a month. And if we wanted to have time for a honeymoon, pack up his life, my life, and then move – we'd have to get married in two weeks. 

By the time I got to the coast, I basically had all the details ironed out.

I parked my car, went inside the oceanfront condo, ran up the stairs and exclaimed, "I have the best idea."

They all looked at me with curiosity, maybe even a little bit of skepticism.

My poor husband got the wedding idea at the same time my mom did. But I knew he'd be on board. He would have married me weeks earlier, had I had the idea then.

I threw out the words "pop up wedding," and gave my road trip definition and concept as quickly as I could.

And the curve ball I threw my mom? I asked her to plan it.


Weddings are meant to celebrate the bride and groom, yet they often stress over every little detail to make so many other people happy. They stress and exhaust themselves. I decided that while I knew we had to help to some extent (especially with the ceremony), I wanted a party thrown in our honor. After all, we decided to keep February 15 as our big wedding day that would fit our personalities. That's the one we would dive in deep to help plan.

For the pop up, I literally wanted to just show up and celebrate our love. I wanted to celebrate us.

Plus, mom knows me. She's one of my best friends, and one of my biggest cheerleaders. And she was so onboard with this plan. In fact, she was thrilled with the idea.

She knew I loved sunflowers. Our February wedding would be vintage, and we were OK with using the same decorations for both weddings and venues. And instead of cake, she already knew donuts were my choice of post-wedding celebration. After all, we did get engaged on national donut day!

She's my mom. She gets me.

And the day turned out beautiful.

I found a white dress on sale at Torrid, saving my yet-to-be-altered dress I found at David's Bridal for the bigger wedding in February – per Richard's request. After all, two different days deserved two different dresses.

I found a special perfume to wear on the wedding day, so whenever I wear it, the smell can take him  back to that special moment of me walking down the aisle to become his wife. As I got ready, my best friend and maid of honor did my hair and makeup, just like she did for my first date with Richard – and for the day we got engaged.

a bride in a lacy dress holding sunflowers, which has a stick of gum in the front.

Richard and I picked every single worship song that played in that service that day. Each song meant something to his heart or my own, and I made sure to honor our first date by borrowing gum stick for my sunflower bouquet. I knew I wanted a moment of prayer with Richard during the wedding, and we picked the song I walked down the aisle too. For this wedding, we went more traditional and basic since we had two weeks and decided to go all out for February.

Oh, and we went live on Facebook.

Yes, there were stressors involved. No, the process wasn't perfect.

There were family emotions and situations. There was a heartache. I was adjusting to a major medication for migraines, which through the whole process and everyone involved for a loop. In addition, we were getting ready for a big move, and I was getting ready to leave the life I knew. I was getting ready to leave my family.

But, now that we've gotten married twice – I've learned that whether you have less than two weeks to plan a wedding, or you have months...every wedding has it's curve balls and stressors. The bloopers, the nerves, the "imperfections" of either day, the things and people out of our control...Psh. Those things don't really matter in the end.

Every wedding is so beautiful in every single way.


Because love.

From the moment I got engaged, my biggest mantra was to make the process as stress-free as possible. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't perfect at it. But at the end of the day? As long as I was married to Richard, that's all that mattered.

And now we've double sealed the deal.

So why did we still get married on February 15, in addition to our October anniversary? That was the dream venue, dream dress, dream ceremony. That was the ceremony where we go to invite all of our friends who have supported us as individuals and as a couple. We also got to take our time planning every detail for this fun party...a celebration of our love!

Love deserves to be celebrated. It should be celebrated. It's worth celebrating!

I waited a long time for Richard, and he waited for me. Two weddings? It's just an extra excuse to celebrate the gift God gave us – each other.

Why not get married twice?

The Travelin' (and Married) Chick,

PS: Stay tuned! Pictures from the next wedding are to come, and we did something a little extra special with those. You won't want to miss those – I guarantee it! 

1 comment:

  1. Crystal, thank you so much for sharing your journey to true love. God is so amazing and I love how when one completely trusts Him, He blows our mind. God designed Richard just for you and He is pouring out His blessings for your obedience to Him. We met at Mt. Hermon Christian Writers Conference. I have followed your journey and am excited for you!!